Relief from an Eating Disorder

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Relief from an Eating Disorder
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Further information on eating disorders
If you struggle with an eating disorder, it is wise to talk about this with someone you can trust, like a parent, counselor or pastor, so they can support and encourage you. If you would like further information on eating disorders, you might try the following web sites:

www.remuda-ranch.com
www.anred.com
www.nationaleatingdisorders.org
www.anad.org

So what do you do if you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder?
What you can do to get help.

If you have an eating disorder, admit you have a problem and get help. Go to your R.A. if you live in the residence halls. Go to Women's resource center. They have support groups and a nutritionist on staff. Call one of the hotline numbers. You may feel you need to see a professional counselor. That's OK. Everyone has counselors of some sort-friends, parents. Professional counselors don't force feed you, but help you get at the root of the problem...how and why you have used food to attempt to meet emotional needs.

If you think your roommate or a friend has an Eating disorder, you need to talk to her about it. If she's anorexic, more than likely she'll never go for help herself. A bulimic woman might go for help because she knows throwing up everyday isn't normal. But, even so, it may be years before she goes for help.

Steps to discussion:

Pick an appropriate time when you won't be interrupted and when you're feeling calm.


Tell her what you've observed without being judgmental. A good way to do this is by using "I" statements and saying how you feel. For example, "I've been worried about what I'm seeing", or "I get angry when my food is missing. I want to find a way to work this out with you. I don't like being mad at you." Avoid telling the person how you think she feels. For example, "You must be very angry or you wouldn't be doing this." This may make her feel attacked or controlled. Be direct and frank, but gentle. Saying" "I hear you vomiting" is better than "I think you spend a lot of time in the bathroom."


Point out any changes you've seen in your relationship. An Eating disordered person tends to pull back in her relationships. Food becomes her best friend.


Try not to get sidetracked. There may be other issues in your relationship...deal with them later. If you're unsure about what to say, get advice from one of the resources on the handout sheet or call me.


Call her parents.
Sometimes there will be immediate relief on the part of the eating disordered person. But on the other hand, she may be very angry at you. That is ok. Whether you get the response you hope for or not, you need to initiate with your friend about her Eating disorder. Her life is in danger!

Your goals are:

To open the lines of communication. You can't deal with it all in one conversation.


To change how the Eating disorder is affecting you. i.e. Is she eating your food? Is the bathroom messy? Maybe she doesn't want to be with you anymore.


To help her get the help she needs. Your goal is not to get her to stop binging, purging, or starving. Instead, provide support so she can explore what she wants to do about the eating disorder.

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